Like Williamsburg in Brooklyn or Echo Park in Los Angeles, there's a stretch of east London that's home to thousands of Shoreditch twats, Nathan Barleys and Dalston Superstars (Google these terms!). Yes, this obsession with being cutting-edge can quickly get tiresome, but beyond the pretence and the hackneyed Hackney hipster haircuts there are some genuinely amazing nights to be had in Dalston, Shoreditch, Hoxton and Bethnal Green.

I'm not a hipster myself, honest, but I'm an underground music geek who loves dive bars, street food, cheap drinks, eccentric cabaret and watching weird-sounding local bands. This tour will be different every time, depending on what's on and what you're into, but venues we might go to include:

- A cafe and recording studio where east London bands rehearse and perform
- A working men's club where events such as sock wrestling, hot-dog eating competitions, contortionists and alt-burlesque take place without irony
- A Shoreditch bar with ping-pong themed nightclubs
- A secret venue with a highly unusual take on speed dating
- A cafe specialising in improvised music from around the world
- Various old pubs turned into hipster drinking dens

You don't have to be cool to come on this tour. If anything, it's probably better if you're not cool. I might feel intimidated.